Wednesday 22 November 2017

A Real-Life Catholic Love Story - Part 10 of 13 - Long Distance Relationship


Read Part 9 here.

Part 10 - Long Distance Relationship

Genevieve and Thomas entered into their relationship on January 30th, and they both had tickets to leave for different countries on February 5th… just six days later! Genevieve was worried at first because it was a new relationship, they were both leaving, and she had already committed to leading a team in the Philippines. But the Lord reminded her that she did not need to worry about this relationship, because He was the one who had initiated the whole thing. 

It was the Lord who had brought her home that year (she hadn’t been planning to go, but she was told to come home), He had brought Thomas into her life, and when Thomas asked her on a date, she felt like the Lord has asked her on a date (because she had never imagined herself with him). God did it all. He told her “Just seek My Kingdom, do not worry about anything, I am taking care of everything else.” God gave them this gift, and He was going to be faithful to it. So she was sure that they were supposed to go back to do His work. She told Thomas, “My service to God is first, before you. God has called me to it, and I know it, and I have to remain faithful to it.”

They went to Mass the next day and consecrated their relationship to Our Lady of Guadalupe. At that Mass, the priest spoke a lot about the call to be share Jesus with the world. This confirmed their desire to continue the work He had already led them to—her leading a team of girls in the Philippines and Thomas back in India. They rejoiced in the fact that they were putting Him first in their relationship, even though at that time they didn’t realize how tough it was going to be.

The months of being in two different countries were hard for Thomas. But God kept reminding him, “She’s the one, have no fear. Don’t be afraid to move forward, you don’t need big signs. I will bless this.” He felt the Lord’s love through her acceptance of him, with all the dark parts of his heart and mind. Like a Bethel song that he heard, “Love is unafraid. It is not blind, it sees the whole thing”, he realized that Genevieve was a woman who saw all the crap happening inside of him, and she still loved him. He had never felt that kind of love before in his life.

For Genevieve, the months of long distance relationship were very healing. Not being able to have any kind of physical relationship was a grace from God, because in the past when she felt inadequate in a relationship, she would just get physical with the guy as a way to fix the feeling of inadequacy. Even though she was sure they wouldn’t have fallen into that sin, she could see the temptation more clearly.

Feelings of inadequacy arose during that time, fears that she wasn’t what he wanted, that she didn’t measure up, she wasn’t a good singer, she wasn’t super Catholic, and she didn’t know the Catechism. Thomas would tell her, “That isn’t what I want.” But the Lord had to speak that to her, and He did. It was a beautiful new experience for her—being in a Christian relationship with a holy man, where she could show him her wounds, her insecurities, and he wouldn’t run away, or think her too complicated. He knew that the Lord wanted to heal her in those areas. She often wondered, “Why does Thomas like me?” because her wounds told her that she had to give him a reason to like her.

But in those months apart, she was able to realize he just loved her because the Lord had given her to him. He didn’t care about her singing ability or knowledge of the Catechism. She grew to love being in a relationship, serving the Lord, and valuing chastity. Even when they faced struggles, it taught them to keep the Lord at the center. They regularly had long phone conversations where they shared and prayed together.

God continued to draw them into a deeper understanding of the kind of relationship He was calling them to. One day in March Genevieve was reading ‘Fill These Hearts’ by Christopher West and she told Thomas, “I just realized— you’re not my everything!” He was blown away. He had never heard of a woman saying that to the man she was in a relationship with. He romantically told her back, “You’re not my everything either.” Their time apart convinced them that they were meant to be in relationship with each other.

But the question that soon arose was— what next? They couldn’t wait to be in the same place, and move forward in their relationship.

When Thomas had been visiting the Philippines a year and a half earlier, long before they were in a relationship, he had been praying about his desire for Genevieve. He had asked the Lord, “How on earth is this going to work? Genevieve loves the Philippines, I’m committed to India. How is it even possible?” The Lord showed him two streams of water—a waterfall coming from one side, and a river coming from another side, joining and flowing together. And He said, “If I want it to happen, it will happen.”

And it did! Genevieve felt called to join Thomas in India. But before they reached that decision, she came to India to visit and co-lead a short term trip.

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